Suffering and Loss

Posted in Emotional · Perspective |  Email This Post | by James Rick

A friend asked recently about the suffering and loss of a dear loved one. Apparently her grandmother suffered for two years with a tube down her throat in a nursing home before passing on. The experience was hard on her and the fact that such a good woman had to suffer so horribly made the father question the existence of a God.

Sometimes extreme suffering and loss can cause us to question whether there really is a ‘caring’ entity known as God or if we’re all just on this planet through some accident. While I cannot answer what ‘God’s’ plan is, or what the specific ‘meaning’ is behind an individuals suffering (the ‘reason’ is different for everyone), I do believe there is a way to RESPOND to suffering and loss in a healthy manner. Having a method for dealing with loss doesn’t mean loss won’t still hurt, it just means you can learn from it and get on with your life more quickly.

A DISCLAIMER ON ‘LOSS EFFICIENCY’
Sometimes people subconsciously want to suffer for extended periods of times as a way to remain connected with the object of their love or to express how much they truly cared for someone. Dealing with loss quickly and moving on with life is generally not acceptable in today’s society. If a man’s wife dies and he’s out enjoying himself a week later - for most people that must ‘mean’ he didn’t really care for her or maybe he secretly wanted out of the marriage. They most likely wouldn’t think, “Oh, he must have an effective method for dealing with loss.” As a result of society’s linking mourning to caring, a prolonged period of suffering (or appearing as though they are suffering) might actually be preferred by some.

On the other side of the coin, some people have naturally developed the ability to move on quickly and might feel guilty about doing so. They might ask themselves, “What is wrong with me - why don’t I suffer longer like everyone else? Do I NOT care?” Understanding that subconsciously you might link your mourning period to caring is important. When your realize that the length of time you suffer doesn’t necessarily equate to how much you care - you free yourself from prolonged suffering. You can really love and care for someone AND return to a resourceful state quickly.

~~
A letter to a mourning grand daughter and a father questioning the existence of God

Sorry to hear about the challenges your grandmother faced before leaving this planet. As for the ‘meaning’ behind your grandmother’s suffering - I can understand why that might cause someone to question spirituality and the existence of God. I have struggled with the question myself when I think of soldiers beating down doors, raping and then murdering a mother in front of a husband and children. Imagining extreme evil helps to define extreme goodness. Extreme suffering creates a space for extreme joy to exist. In the words of Kahlil Gibran, “Sorrow carves out our being, but the space it makes provides room for more joy in another season of life.”

THE MEANING OF SUFFERING & LOSS
The meaning of your grandmother’s suffering is whatever you make it - and it’s different for everyone. To your grandmother it could be the final phase of her journey where she had an important lesson to learn about letting go of her body and the need to control things; an important lesson for the Ego to learn. For your father it could be a lesson of detachment from that which is temporary; it was inevitable that they would have to part ways on this Earth, one way or another. Perhaps he should be grateful that it was she that went first instead of him, for example is it possible that ‘God’ may have spared your grandmother from having to watch HIM suffer and die? Perhaps a loving God would know that it was HE that was the stronger of the two.

NEVER WHAT WE EXPECT
Death and suffering never really does happen the way we would expect. There’s a good chance we will be sad, disappointed and surprised anytime someone close to us suffers and dies, yet this has been going on for thousands of years. All you have to do is look around and see there is loss happening every day. The only guarantee in life is change. Everything and everyone around us are temporary. This includes our closest relationships and our own physical body.

UNDERSTANDING TEMPORARINESS
Understanding the dual nature to all creations prepares you for loss. When we are in love - we should not be surprised if hate or pain lurks on the other side. When we enjoy something temporary, we should not be surprised if loss and suffering happens.

Even with understanding, loss may still hurt when it happens – but it helps to really embrace the temporariness of life in advance. Rather than getting angry or feeling singled out – we can say “well, it is what it is“. It is what it is. (no meaning associated with it, just a statement of fact.) This doesn’t mean we didn’t care very much for the person or whatever we lost. It simply means we recognized even during the ‘glory days’ it was all a temporary experience. And rather than becoming attached to the things we enjoy most (like people and conditions)– instead we can truly appreciate them when they are here and wave good bye in a healthy, resourceful manner when they are gone.

IN SUMMARY
1) Change is going to happen whether we like it or not. The only thing we decide is how we respond to the inevitable.
2) Reminding ourselves daily that everything we are experiencing now is temporary (by imagining them as already gone), will prepare us when the inevitable departure occurs.
3) And when loss happens - we don’t have to link any meaning to it. It is what it is. The important question to ask is this: What have I learned from the experience so I can be a better person and live a better life?

How to Balance the 6 Major Life Areas for Greater Well Being

Posted in Self Improvement · Spiritual Guidance |  Email This Post | by James Rick

BALANCE FOR WELL BEING
Every day is a balance. Nutritionists suggest that you eat a variety of fruits, vegetables and proteins to make sure your body is getting all the essential nutrients and building blocks for your body. This same strategy is also important for other areas of your life as well. For example are you giving proper focus to your physical, mental, spiritual, social, emotional and financial well being or is the focus disproportionately invested into just a couple areas?

ARE YOU NEGLECTING AN ‘ESSENTIAL’ AREA?
Do you feel you are neglecting other important areas of your life? If so why? Many times people ‘know’ they should be focusing on another area and they are ‘trying’ but then they ‘RATIONAL-LIES’ (make up a story to explain their behavior) why they can’t put the effort into it they know they should.

THE SIX MAJOR AREAS OF LIFE ARE ESSENTIAL FOR WELL BEING
The reason why its so important to evaluate your life regularly based on these six major areas is because they are all essential to your well being. This fact is self evident - try to neglect any one area and your entire system suffers. Much like your diet, if you aren’t getting enough of one essential nutrient - even if overall you are eating healthy the system still begins to break down.

THE PLANT / PET METAPHOR
Imagine some areas are like plants - they need just a little nurturing to grow healthy while other areas are more like a pet, requiring significantly more time and attention to be healthy. Intuitively you’ll know when its time to nurture the plant - especially if the leaves start to sag and turn brown. You’ll also know when the pet requires more food or water - usually right away because he starts to nag at you. A simple metaphor I know, but the same thing is happening internally. If you don’t focus on financial growth- bill collectors start to nag at you. If you don’t focus on exercise, eating healthy or drinking plenty of water - your body begins to nag at you. If you aren’t developing yourself mentally - you’ll begin to feel stagnant. If you aren’t nurturing yourself spiritually - you’ll begin to feel empty inside. If you aren’t focusing on the social aspect of your life - you’ll begin to feel lonely and isolated. If you aren’t taking control of your emotions, creating a pause between stimulus and response - you are more reactive and feel ‘out of control’. There are many early warning signals that the leaves are sagging or turning brown. Do you listen to them and nurture these vital areas of your life or do you ignore them and place excessive focus on only one area of your garden?

HOW DO YOU BALANCE?
The first key is to realize that you don’t need to invest the same amount of time in all areas - what a relief right? But you do need to invest SOME time on a daily basis.

The easiest way to balance the six major areas of life is to simply be aware of them on a daily basis. Go down the list and ask yourself: “How do I feel about this area in my life right now?” Notice what you feel. Then ask yourself, “What goal would I like to set for this area of my life?” Set a clear and specific goal - something that YOU can actually take action on with no excuses. Even if you are super busy, setting a goal of 5 minutes for nurturing yourself spiritually while driving to work is far better than feeling tense about traffic.

Energy flows where focus goes. It’s as simple as that. By simply using the six major areas as landmarks for your focus and getting clear on how you want to develop them - you are nurturing them in that moment! And the time you invest in them later.

WHY MOST PEOPLE AREN’T LIVING THEIR FULL POTENTIAL
The reason why most people fall short of reaching their full potential is in my opinion, because they fall into a low value (low return on investment) pattern and stay there for a very long time. They neglect some essential area of their life and they come up with a good story for why they are doing it. The story then becomes the handcuff that chains them to one ‘landmark’. They become a slave to one plant while the others are dying.

FULL POTENTIAL ACTION STEPS
1) Evaluate the six major areas of your life (how do you FEEL about these areas):
A) Physical
B) Mental
C) Spiritual
D) Social
E) Emotional
F) Financial
2) Set a simple time goal for each area. Start with how much time you CAN invest in developing each area. Be honest with yourself, no stories this time.
3) Think about the specific activity you would like to engage in during that time. For financial that might be easy because you already have a ‘job’ with a specific job function and predetermined daily time investment. Now all you need to do is tackle the other areas of your life with the same clarity.

I Wonder

Posted in Emotional |  Email This Post | by James Rick

Those who walk this path
and see what I see
or feel what I feel
To what end, I wonder

This breath so alive
it fades into the next
and so on they go
where do they go, I wonder

My place; like a breath
alive in this moment
ready to fade
but where will I go, I wonder

The Fourteen Precepts of Interbeing - Thich Nhat Hanh

Posted in Power Lists and Formulas |  Email This Post | by James Rick

The following fourteen ‘precepts’ are views expressed by the author and Buddhist Monk Thich Nhat Hanh. Thich Nhat Hanh was born in Vietnam in 1926, and he left home as a teenager to become a Zen monk. In Vietnam, he founded the School of Youth for Social Service, Van Hanh Buddhist University, and the Tiep Hien Order (Order of Interbeing). He has taught at Columbia University and the Sorbonne, was Chair of the Vietnamese Buddhist Peace Delegation to the Paris Peace Talks, and was nominated by Martin Luther King, Jr. for the Nobel Peace Prize. Since 1966, he has lived in exile in France, where he continues his writing, teaching, gardening, and helping refugees worldwide. He is the author of seventy five books including Being Peace, The Miracle of Mindfulness, and The Sun, My Heart.

These fourteen precepts serve as guides, though some precepts need further clarification; specifically related to wealth, politics and sex. I make these clarifications at the end.

1. Do not be idolatrous about or bound to any doctrine, theory, or ideology, even Buddhist ones. Buddhist systems of thought are guiding means; they are not absolute truth.

2. Do not think the knowledge you presently possess is changeless, absolute truth. Avoid being narrow-minded and bound to present views. Learn and practice nonattachment from views in order to be open to receive others’ viewpoints. Truth is found in life and not merely in conceptual knowledge. Be ready to learn throughout your entire life and to observe reality in yourself and
in the world at all times.

3. Do not force others, including children, by any means whatsoever, to adopt your views, whether by authority, threat, money, propaganda, or even education. However, through compassionate dialogue, help others renounce fanaticism and narrowness.

4. Do not avoid contact with suffering or close your eyes before suffering. Do not lose awareness of the existence of suffering in the life of the world. Find ways to be with those who are suffering, including personal contact, visits, images, and sounds. By such means, awaken yourself and others to the reality of suffering in the world.

5. Do not accumulate wealth while millions are hungry. Do not take as the aim of your life fame, profit, wealth, or sensual pleasure. Live simply and share time, energy, and material resources with those who are in need.

6. Do not maintain anger or hatred. Learn to penetrate and transform them when they are still seeds in your consciousness. As soon as they arise, turn your attention to your breath in order to see and understand the nature of your anger and hatred and the nature of the persons who have caused your anger and hatred.

7. Do not lose yourself in dispersion and in your surroundings. Practice mindful breathing to come back to what is happening in the present moment. Be in touch with what is wondrous, refreshing and healing both inside and around you. Plant seeds of joy, peace, and understanding in yourself in order to facilitate the work of transformation in the depths of your consciousness.

8. Do not utter words that can create discord and cause the community to break. Make every effort to reconcile and resolve all conflicts however small.

9. Do not say untruthful things for the sake of personal interest or to impress people. Do not utter words that cause division and hatred. Do not spread news that you do not know to be certain. Do not criticize or condemn things of which you are not sure. Always speak truthfully and constructively. Have the courage to speak out about situations of injustice, even when doing so may threaten your own safety.

10. Do not use the Buddhist community for personal gain or profit, or transform your community into a political party. A religious community, however, should take a clear stand against oppression and injustice and should strive to change the situation without engaging in partisan conflicts.

11. Do not live with a vocation that is harmful to humans and nature. Do not invest in companies that deprive others of their chance to live. Select a vocation that helps realize your ideal of compassion.

12. Do not kill. Do not let others kill. Find whatever means possible to protect life and prevent war.

13. Possess nothing that should belong to others. Respect the property of others, but prevent others from profiting from human suffering or the suffering of other species on Earth.

14. Do not mistreat your body. Learn to handle it with respect. Do not look on your body as only an instrument. Preserve vital energies (sexual, breath, spirit) for the realization of the Way. (For brothers and sisters who are not monks and nuns:) Sexual expression should not take place without love and a long term commitment. In sexual relationships, be aware of future suffering
that may be caused. To preserve the happiness of others, respect the rights and commitments of others. Be fully aware of the responsibility of bringing new lives into the world. Meditate on the world into which you are bringing new beings.

~~

WEALTH
5. Do not accumulate wealth while millions are hungry. Do not take as the aim of your life fame, profit, wealth, or sensual pleasure. Live simply and share time, energy, and material resources with those who are in need.

Wealth (at this time) is a driver of society. And the accumulation of wealth empowers the accumulator. Money then becomes an extension of their intention. Better to empower an idea that serves the greater good through the accumulation and investment of wealth in the right areas than not. Providing necessities to the millions of unfortunate is only possibly through the deliberate and intelligent organization of material resources. The best known ‘motivator’ for the deliberate and intelligent organization of materials resources is money. That may change in the future, but it is what it is for now.

The key here is that you must KNOW yourself before the accumulation of wealth. Otherwise you can fool yourself into believing you have good intentions until you acquire wealth and then squander it on sensual / ego pleasure. This caution was expressed best by Lord Acton in a letter to Bishop Mandell Creighton in 1887:

“Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Great men are
almost always bad men.”

According to Lord Acton some great men were NOT bad men - those not corrupted by power deserve careful study. What you may find is that the truly ‘great’ are first masters of themselves. They develop this self mastery through great self study / awareness and adjustment.

POLITICS
10. Do not use the Buddhist community for personal gain or profit, or transform your community into a political party. A religious community, however, should take a clear stand against oppression and injustice and should strive to change the situation without engaging in partisan conflicts.

Politics is an amoral tool, it can be used for good or evil. It should not be seen as something to avoid, but rather something to carefully guide. If you transform an educated community into a force for good in the world - why not do it? A great deal of good can be accomplished through leveraging political power. A democratic government in its essence is made up ‘of the people, by the people, for the people’; it is a community with a shared aim. Therefore the political ambitions of a community if alignment with the majority of the people can serve a great purpose, such as the fair and efficient distribution of resources FOR ALL, whether that be on a small or large scale.

SEX
14. .. Sexual expression should not take place without love and a long term commitment. In sexual relationships, be aware of future suffering that may be caused. To preserve the happiness of others, respect the rights and commitments of others. Be fully aware of the responsibility of bringing new lives into the world. Meditate on the world into which you are bringing new beings.

Precept #14 needs clarification: “sexual expression should not take place without love and a long term commitment.” If only it were that simple. Love is not always distinguishable from lust. Lust can create the illusion of ‘we’ll be together forever’. In some religions or cultures where sex is only appropriate when married - people make a long term commitment to satisfy their lust. This is not done consciously, they don’t say to themselves: “I’m going to get married so I can satisfy my lust.” Instead they say something like, “I feel this incredible chemistry with this person, I feel so amazing when I’m with them - I want to take our relationship to the next level. I could see us together forever.” Only to regret their decision later. They might stay together because they made the commitment when in fact they would be better off separated.

Irresponsible sexual relations are unsafe, deceptive, manipulative and not only cause pain to the participants but perhaps more importantly may bring life into the world that is not guaranteed a ‘long term commitment’ by its parents - which is something nature presupposes (Have sex, rear children long term).

But responsible sex between two self aware, individuals can actually help them define biological lust over a more soulful love. The experience of sex can actually create more clarity in the relationship. And even if the relationship isn’t intended to be long term - responsible and consensual sex can still be beneficial. For example in some Gnostic and Hindu practices temple ‘whores’ were incorporated into meditative practice as a way to achieve divine spiritual union between the male and female.

I would venture to guess that Thich Nhat Hanh is coming from an ideological direction which sounds good in theory, but in practice correctly combining ‘love’ and ‘long term commitment’ with sexual relations is not quite so easy.

IN SUMMARY
With a little clarification, the 14 precepts of Interbeing serve as a ‘good’ guideline for the long term health of society.

The Meaning of Life

Posted in Perspective · Self Improvement |  Email This Post | by James Rick

Events are neutral. It is the interpretation / perception of events that colors them positive or negative. The meaning of life is what you make it.

THE SOURCE OF MEANING
From your perspective you judge the good and the bad. If you kill an annoying fly - is that bad? To the fly, yes. For you, no. You will no longer be annoyed by the fly. To a third party - they may not care either way - to them it is neither good nor bad, it simply is (a neutral event). This means meaning is relative to the observer. I’ll say that again - meaning is relative to the observer.

ISN’T FLEXIBLE MEANING DANGEROUS?
You might be asking yourself, is meaning really that flexible - isn’t that quite dangerous? Couldn’t someone twist meaning around no matter what the event? Yes they could and history is rife with examples.

What does a geographical shape mean? (It could be a Nazi symbol or a harmless logo)
What does a cloud mean? (It could be water condensation or the face of an angel)
What does a crashing window mean? (It could be a robbery in progress or a fallen tree limb)

HOW YOUR BRAIN CREATES MEANING
First it attempts to understand the concept or idea (example: meaning is what you make it) - then it attempts to decipher the meaning behind it (example: this is a dangerous idea).

The two ingredients for learning:
(1) the concept / idea and
(2) the meaning

Now here’s where it gets interesting - if the initial concept or idea (or event) is wrongly interpreted the meaning will have no basis in reality.

Ten people can witness the same event and come away with ten different meanings. The facts of what were observed will remain fairly consistent (she was wearing red, she had a gun, etc.) - but what it means could be different entirely (he deserved it, she was wrong, etc.).

Now notice I said IF the initial concept is wrongly interpreted - this is assuming there IS a right interpretation. For example in the realm of human affairs we know there is ‘right’ interpretations of body language, or voice tone, etc. But in more abstract realms like art or a literature there may be no ‘right’ interpretation. And in most cases outside the realm of human affairs there is no ‘right’ interpretation - there is only WHAT IS (a neutral event).

So we have human affairs where meaning has great relevance and importance. And we have everything else outside of human affairs where meaning is technically absent. Yet here’s the interesting thing about the human brain: even where there is no meaning the brain will create meaning.

THE BRAIN CREATES MEANING
Yes, this means the brain takes it limited information and mostly makes stuff up. There is no way on Earth the brain could possibly learn all there is to know about reality - so it learns enough to draw conclusions and uses these ‘rules’ of reality as guidelines for it’s experience.

This is why the truly wise know that they know nothing. They know enough to function but they are always one step away from truly knowing reality - because most of what they know is a self generated experience. The brain has clouded them (the observer) with a self generated reality - a reality full of meanings that may or may not be ‘true’ in the greater context of the universe. And rather than seeking to gather more information that will enable it to form accurate meanings it spends a greater deal of time seeking information to support the meanings that could be false. In short the brain says, “I believe, now I need information to support this belief.” Far more often than it says, “I don’t know what to believe, I need to learn more.” Perhaps it does this as a survival technique better suited for earlier times. For the brain it might be better to have a belief that might be false than to have no belief at all. Still the fact remains - most beliefs are self generated reality.

The question is - which beliefs are accurate and which are false?

Again as a general rule: In the realm of human affairs
(1) Most concepts / ideas/ events / behaviors, etc. have a right interpretation
(2) There can be a right or wrong meaning

In the realms outside of human affairs:
(1) Most natural and universal forces have no right interpretation
(2) There cannot be a right or wrong meaning

In the first case, in the realm of human affairs- Example: Someone sends you a card on an agreed upon holiday (event) therefore they must love or care for you (meaning). The beliefs you form about your reality are generally accurate. (Of course even human based reality can get more complicated as humans tend to mask intentions and one must become socially and emotionally intelligent to peel back the layers of human reality - nevertheless there can be a right or wrong in the realm of human affairs.)

In the second case, in realms outside of human affairs- Example: Lightening strikes a tree and it comes crashing down on the head of a dear family member (neutral event). God must have cursed them (meaning). The meanings derived from the natural / supernatural forces are generally created, have no basis of right or wrong and become self projected realities. Other examples: A lucky blanket. A devastating flood. A missed plane that then goes down.

The belief that somehow ‘karma’ (the residual effects from past and current life) is somehow associated with natural / supernatural events is a way to explain what we consider ‘good’ and ‘bad’ in human affairs. Of course human beings need some kind of explanation for things otherwise they cannot learn from them. (Remember the two ingredients for learning: concept + meaning)

Now when a person dies - on a universal level that is the most natural and normal thing in the world and accidents simply happen. But in the realm of human affairs death is significant with ‘good’ and ‘bad’ connected with death. For the person that died, death simply happened. To those whom the person was close the death is something to be dealt with / learned from.

What I’m describing here is neither good nor bad. Why? Because It is an objective description of human affairs. But if we enter the realm of human affairs you might say what I’m writing is bad because it is a cold approach to death. Or you might say it is good because it frees a person up to move on. Again the meaning you place on my description depends on where you are at in your life. Meaning is relative.

ALL MEANING IS RELATIVE
What is the meaning of water? Water could mean life to a plant. Or it could mean a drink of water to someone who is thirsty. Or it could mean death to those who are drowned by it. Or it could mean the season has changed for those who see it as rain. Or it could mean the tide has risen or fallen to those standing on the shore. Or it could mean absolutely nothing if nothing observes it.

In this example the water stays the same but the meaning of the water shifts in each scenario depending on who is observing it and in what context.

First it attempts to understand the concept or idea (meaning is what you make it) - then it attempts to decipher the meaning behind it (this is a dangerous idea).

MEANING USING ‘THE ZOOM IN / ZOOM OUT’ METHOD

Another way of understanding the realm of human affairs versus the realm of the universe is through what I often refer to as the “Zoom In / Zoom Out” method.

Zooming In
The zoomed in perspective of course is inside the realm of human affairs. This is where all events have meaning. And even if we understand that logically a storm that kills our best friend simply is - we will still experience the human emotions of pain and sadness. We will still be very much apart of the human drama while we are human. No matter how wise you become, there really is no escape from experiencing the pains of the human drama unless you are no longer human. But you do not have to remain zoomed in and magnify an already ‘bad’ situation. You can zoom out and see the bigger picture and by doing so the full meaning is open to you.

Zooming Out
Zooming out in times of difficult human experiences enables you to deal with the human drama on one level, but to also see the bigger picture on another. It allows your awareness to feel the fire without getting burned. But not only is it useful from the perspective of pain / pleasure. When you look at things zoomed out and objectively it allows you to see things more clearly. This perspective enables you to make better long term progress.

In short: Being zoomed in allows you to feel more. Being zoomed out allows you to see more. A balance of the two is an important part of being human.

IN SUMMARY

1) You are the source of meaning
2) Meaning is based on interpretation of a concept / idea / event / behavior / etc.
3) In the realm of human affairs, most concepts / ideas / events / behaviors / etc. have a right or a wrong / a good and bad which allow accurate & useful meanings to form.
4) In the realm of universal affairs, natural events have no right or wrong, no good or bad - they simply are. Meaning formed out of these events are human attempts to explain or understand that which is beyond human understanding.
5) You can use this knowledge to:
A - Become more socially and emotionally intelligent in human affairs
B - Become more open minded about neutral events
C -Transform meanings and beliefs that cause unnecessary suffering.
D - Re-interpret events so that the meanings may aid you in a positive way.

Ultimately, knowledge of how meaning is formed gives you freedom to play with your reality.

3 Kinds of Meditation You Can Do Right Now

Posted in Self Improvement · Spiritual Guidance |  Email This Post | by James Rick

The following are three types of meditations I do almost every morning. If you have limited time in the morning you can do just one, or try to move through them quickly. I find that by doing them consistently I require less time to do them. But if I let a few days go by without doing them I need more time to focus, slow the mind down and do them properly.

As for your posture - the important thing is that your back is straight. You can do these meditations lying down but its easier to fall asleep especially if you’re doing them first thing in the morning. So I suggest finding a comfortable way to sit up straight, even if you need a little back support. Sitting cross legged or with feet flat on the floor is up to you.

10 SECOND BREATHING MEDITATION
The 10 Second Breathing Meditation is quite simple - simply focus on your breath for 10 CONSECUTIVE breaths without thinking of anything else. If you think of something else for more than a few moments before you remember that you’re supposed to focus on your breath - you must start the count over at 1. To make this meditation easier, I suggest you say over and over to yourself during each breath “I’m right here, right now. I’m right here, right now.” This will gather your focus to the present making it easier to remember to focus on your breath when your mind wants to wander away and think about all your other worries and concerns.

If you are simply too distracted by your mind’s wanderings what I suggest is that you also have a piece of paper and pen nearby so that every time a worry pops up and tries to dominate your focus, you write it down and honor your brain for trying to help you remember what’s important. Then remind yourself that the goal right now is to focus on the breath. Then resume your count and your chant of “I’m right here, right now.” Each time your mind wanders longer than a few moments, write down what your brain thought was so important and return to your meditation. Even though I intended to meditate, by honoring the ideas that seem to flow into this empty space I have had many insights and breakthroughs.

If you have watched any of the videos you are already familiar with this meditation. This is my ‘default’ meditation any time I want to slow the mind down. The great thing about it is that it doesn’t matter where you are or how much time you have - if you have even just a few moments you can focus on at least a couple of consecutive breaths without thinking of anything else - and that’s enough to slow the mind down and benefit you with greater mental clarity, peace and focus.

OHM THANKFULNESS MEDITATION
After the first meditation the wheel of your mind will be much slower, making it easier to focus. In this second meditation you are going to appreciate all that you are so thankful for. Breathe in deep, bring someone or something into mind that you appreciate and exhale while making the sound “Ohhmmmmm”. In ancient texts like the Upanishads, Ohm represents the divine and the power of God. Through appreciating what you have in your life and expressing it through the sound of Ohm you resonate fully with that which has been created.

If there are people in your house and you feel awkward expressing the Ohm sound out loud - I suggest you say it in your head with every exhale. I have tried both the vocalizing method and the mentalizing method and I have found that whenever possible the Ohm sound vocalized makes it more ‘real’ for me - meaning it’s easier to focus when I can hear the Ohm sound in my own voice.

Continue with expressing thankfulness with each breath for about 10 breaths, or as long as you wish until you feel you have expressed appreciation for everything you have in your life. If you want to take this meditation a step further - imagine that everything you have in your life was suddenly gone. Reflect on what would be the most painful - and now appreciate that it’s still here. Notice how your priorities shift; like how health and relationships grow in importance.

I have noticed this meditation usually flips a switch in my brain. My brain lives in the future a lot - dreaming and planning what it wants to create. While this mechanism can and does serve you - it often neglects the things you already have. If you let your brain run this mechanism all the time you will constantly be aware of the things you don’t have - creating a state of perpetual stress and/or anxiety. But when you do the thankfulness meditation you are suddenly aware of everything you already have. It brings you a sense of peace that can best defined as fulfillment. Not trying to achieve anything you can become aware and grateful for what you already have. Notice the difference in how you feel before and after this meditation.

AHM CREATION MEDITATION
The sound “Ahm” is known in ancient texts as the sound of creation. Where the sound “Ohm” completes the cycle of creation, the sound “Ahm” starts it.

To do the Ahm meditation sit up with your back straight, breathe in deep and exhale to the sound of “Ahhhhmmm”. Again you can do this out loud or in your mind depending on your situation. As you exhale imagine that energy is flowing from your pelvic / groin region up through the crown of your head and is attracting to you whatever you want to create.

I find the more energy you can put behind your intention the more effective this meditation is. So it truly requires focus. But focus is easy when you are putting every ounce of your energy behind it. Do the creation meditation for about 10 breaths or until you feel you have covered all the things you want to create in your life with each breath.

I have been doing this meditation for almost 10 years now and I find that I have developed a deep pattern for all that I wish to create. What I mean is - I’ve been intending to create confidence, peace, love, happiness, positivity, zest, passion, wealth, attraction, sense of humor, health and a high value daily routine and other specific goals for so long that I can just roll through the list one by one imagining what it looks like & feels like with each Ahm exhale.

The ‘vision’ for whatever you’re trying to create might be a little fuzzy at first but each time you practice this meditation it should become clearer. Make an effort to really clarify what you are intending to create and notice the excitement you feel when you really resonate with that vision. The energy you use to create and the vision of your creation - causes you to connect with a higher energy. I notice after the creation meditation I feel amazing. This is perhaps one of the best ways to utilize the law of attraction because it puts so much emotional intensity and energy behind it. . Also by time I’m finished with this third meditation I feel like I have done wonders to calm the brain down, which is a nice side benefit.

IN SUMMARY

Experiment with each meditation and don’t worry about doing them perfectly. As long as you are persistent you will discover the best way for yourself. The important thing is that you are making time for these meditations. Which brings us to a very important point - when you are deciding to meditate from a chaotic state of mind you will often NOT feel like meditating. You might find yourself coming up with some kind of excuse why you don’t have the time. You have to make time - you need to schedule it into your day.

One thing I do before I start my day is just notice two things: My environment and my mental state. And I ask myself if I can truly be effective in the day based on my environment and my mental state. The environment is easy to fix - in fact many people I know are obsessive about the cleanliness of their environment. My hypothesis on this is that this gives them a feeling of control on some level because mentally they are often not in control. But environment AND mental state are controllable. Through using the meditations outlined above you can not only control your mental state (Meditation 1: The 10 Second Breathing Meditation) and instantly create feelings of fulfillment (Meditation 2: Ohm Thankfulness Meditation) but you can also maximize the potential of creating anything you want in your life (Meditation 3: Ahm Creation Meditation)

If this is your first time - please experiment with these meditations at least once and share your feedback here.

Powerful Paper Planning Method - A Tool for Living Your Full Potential

Posted in Power Lists and Formulas · Self Improvement |  Email This Post | by James Rick

I just got off the phone with Nancy Christie - we did an interview about Full Potential.com on her morning show. The call went well - we discussed key ideas and a practical way for people to start immediately applying Full Potential in their life.

For those of you that don’t have ‘enough time’ for all the things you know you should be doing, here’s something I suggest:

FULL POTENTIAL PLANNING ON PAPER
1) Take out a blank sheet of paper
2) Fold it twice - creating four squares when you unfold it.
3) In the top right square write down: “Goals”
4) In the bottom right square write down: “Activities”
5) In the top left square write down “Schedule”
6) In the bottom left square write down “Time Log”

(You can move the boxes to different locations on the paper if you want.)

GOALS
7) Now in the Goals square - write down all the things you want to create in your life in the near or distant future. It might help to think in terms of the six main areas of life: Physical, Mental, Spiritual, Social, Emotional and Financial.

Example:
Physically - Healthy, Vibrant, Alive
Mentally - Great Mental Clarity and Focus, Positive Thinking
Spiritually - Growing in Awareness Every Day
Emotionally - Centered, Peaceful, Loving Others and Feeling Loved
Financially - $______ per month or $_______ by ______ (date)

ACTIVITIES
8 ) Now in the Activities square - start by writing down all the things you feel you have to do today; everything that’s on your mind - put it on paper.
9) Now look at each activity and think about how it relates to your goals above. Ask yourself - is this activity really important in relation to my goals? At this point you may have to add some new goals you weren’t aware of or eliminate some activities that are pointless.

SCHEDULE
10) Now in the top left column you start blocking your time for today. Example of one hour time block: 7 - 8 AM: Meditation
11) Start with whatever time it is right now and start with whatever activity you feel like working on. Block off how much time you think it’s going to take. You can do this with just a couple of activities or schedule out your whole day this way. I recommend just pulling a couple of activities from your activity box and creating a few time blocks in your Schedule box until you get used to doing it. You will want to have blank space to Re-Schedule when your first schedule gets off track - this is inevitable

TIME LOG
12) In your time log box (lower left) you write down what actually happened with your time. With the Time log box you can become aware of how reality deviated from your intention. The Schedule box is how you intend to use your time and the Time log box is how your time was actually used. This is kind of awareness is invaluable, especially in the beginning since you’ll be off track most of the time.

Don’t get frustrated when you go off track - expect it! After you complete each activity, cross it out and make a little note of the time it actually took in your time log. And when your schedule gets off track just rewrite the current time with the available white space in the Schedule box and begin on the next activity.

When time runs over on an activity in your schedule, cross out the activities that you completed, scribble out your old schedule and use the remaining space. If you need more space for any area just flip the sheet over and recreate your boxes. Even though it might feel like you are rewriting stuff - there’s a method to this madness. Repetition is critical for programming the subconscious mind and every time you write down your goals you are embedding them deeper into your unconscious. Most people don’t have goals or wait until the end of the year to set them and then never look at them again. What I’m suggesting you do is rewrite your goals at least twice in any given day - that’s 770x a year! And yes, your goals might change over the year as you change as a person- expect that too. But they only change because you got more clear on what you wanted - and that clarity comes even faster when you’re writing them down hundreds of times in a year.

IN SUMMARY
This is a system for getting where you want to go. Do not be fooled by its simplicity however, it’s an incredibly powerful focus tool! The combination of a Schedule and a Time Log employs the Zoom Out / Zoom In method of planning and executing which puts your day to day activities into a long term perspective. You zoom out when you set your goals, you zoom in when you write down your short term activities. When you know how your day to day activities tie in with an end result, you’ll know why you’re doing what you’re doing. As a result you will feel more calm and empowered as you go through your day. Even if you don’t get a lot done, you’ll feel a sense of direction as you create your destiny. Over time this system for getting things done through paper will also become the way you think automatically.

The beauty of this system is in its simplicity. If you want to get more ‘advanced’ in your planning I suggest you use a program like Goal Enforcer or if you want a more robust program for your appointments and to-dos I suggest Time & Chaos (type them into Google). However I still suggest you still use the paper method to structure the way you think and to keep the main ideas in front of you at all times. Fold the paper and take it with you wherever you go and be reminded of your goals or your most important activities. It’s also fun to look back on your day and see what you actually accomplished.

A LIVING RECORD
If you save the paper after you’re done with it, you can compile them and look back on what you accomplished over a span of time. Your planning sheet becomes a detailed journal of your progress.

~~

Please try this exercise out at least once right now to get the hang of it and share the results of your experiment here.

What Experiences Do You Want to Create?

Posted in Perspective · Spiritual Guidance |  Email This Post | by James Rick

For many years I struggled with the question: “What is the highest value thing I can focus on right now?” I thought if there was one true path I wanted to know what it was. I didn’t want to waste any time. If I could know what that ‘high value’ path was for certain – I wanted to walk on it. This question caused me to regularly zoom out re-evaluate if I was truly on the highest value path. This question is the seed in which the Full Potential philosophy grew.

“WHAT EXPERIENCES DO YOU WANT TO CREATE?”
Overtime I realized that to answer the question: “What is the highest value thing to focus on right now?” You must know something else first. Value cannot be defined by itself. To know the value of something you must know how it will be used. So to answer the question, “What is the highest value thing I can focus on right now?” You should first answer the question: “What experience are you trying to create?” After hearing this question in my head over and over again and then linking it to high value focus, I smiled.To have the power to ‘decide’ what we are trying to create and then measure high value on that basis is a godlike ability.

CONSCIOUSNESS EVOLVED TO ASSIST EVOLUTION
Human beings are the most conscious beings on the planet – why? An evolutionary intelligence stumbled along for millions of years and then suddenly gave birth to a conscious intelligence that could adapt faster to environmental challenges. For example when it gets cold outside, rather than waiting millions of years to evolve fur, you just know its cold outside so you throw on a coat. Because it could get hot again and then instead of waiting millions of years to lose the fur again you just take off the coat. In short, conscious ability is a strength of evolution. Your ability to be logical is not an accident – consciousness is a tool being used by evolution to evolve faster. And self awareness is something that emerges from within self consciousness. This may be something that evolution did not plan on – a being aware of itself. But then again a being that is aware of itself is also more effective than a being that is not. Therefore self awareness may also serve as corrective logic.

IS THERE A ‘BEST’ FOR WHAT TO CREATE?
If you evolved conscious capabilities to decipher high value, it may be evidence that what is the ‘best’ creation is still being discovered through trial and error. This means that what you are creating in your life right now is part of the process for discovering the best way to live! The implications of this are huge. You (as an individual and as a civilization) are deciding right now the ‘best’ experience. There is no ‘correct’ path other than what you say there is. And through a vote of collective will you are deciding the best experience for yourself and for all

THE DOMINANT IDEOLOGY BECOMES COLLECTIVE REALITY
Now when I say collective will – I mean the most dominant of ‘memes’ or ideologies will prevail – but only for a time before they are evaluated and are transformed or replaced by newer, improved ideologies. Because an ideology is like an experiment and as it plays out it is studied and improved upon. Some great thinker might create a ‘new’ ideology but it is built upon the usable foundation of older ideas. Take for example the Constitution of the United States, it was not invented out of thin air, every form of government since the beginning of recorded history was studied and borrowed from. The past governments served as experiments by which a ‘new’ government could be created. All surviving religions have evolved over time as well. New rules, new orders, new amendments, basically by making gradual changes to its “DNA” the ideology has survived. Though it might still be called by the same name, it is not the same as it once was.

EVERYTHING WILL CHANGE
This means everything is open for evaluated right now: all religions, all institutions, and all philosophies – all is being evaluated on the basis of utility. Some serve as excellent vehicles to a higher consciousness right now and others are looked down upon as primitive and needing to be discarded in order for us to advance. What does it mean to evaluate on the basis of utility? It means that you silently ask yourself: “Is this useful? Is this benefiting me in some way? Is this relevant to what I value in life?” This is how all information is evaluated. You are asking yourself questions like these as you read this. Change is happening right now.

IS THERE A FINAL DESTINATION?
Are we working towards a model of ‘the best’? Do species keep evolving forever? Does civilization ever arrive at a point of ‘best’? Could you ever arrive at a place in life where you could honestly say “Life could not be any better!” and mean it?

No there is no final stage, not on the physical plane at least. Species will keep evolving forever. Civilization will never arrive at a final destination. Life can always be better. Because as sure as time is infinite progress is too.

IS TAKING A STEP BACKWARDS STILL PROGRESS?
Even though you might falter, progress is still made. A step backwards is not a step in the same stream. All of life is in transition and what appears to be a step backwards is inevitably temporary because if you realize it to be a step backwards you will be motivated to take a step forward. Remember – as you decide what’s best you move in that direction. Even if there seems to be obstructions that you are powerless to remove, the obstructions will inevitably fall because the collective will of life will overrun them – like a dam destined to fall before a great body of water. No resistance (read: no ruler, no organization, no government, etc) can hold back the raging will of higher intelligence. The frustration you might feel about changing the way things are is a frustration that flows through you from this higher intelligence that recognizes a better way. Although you may not always realize the change in your lifetime (that is to great disappointment to the Ego) the change will inevitably occur. This does not mean you should wait to act– on the contrary the sooner you act to improve a situation the more closely you are aligned with this higher intelligence and the more fulfilling your life will be. Nature has cleverly ensured that the thing you are passionate about is where you can have the most impact. Therefore your life purpose and the will of this higher intelligence are infused together – and your mission is to discover it and make it the dominant focus of your life.

HOW CAN YOU GET ON THE ‘RIGHT’ PATH NOW?
When we slow down our brain and listen we begin to employ the higher intelligence within us to discover our highest value path. Then we also have the power to choose whether to take that path. And the entire path is not always visible. In fact the path is often fuzzy with only the first step visible. That is faith – taking that first step and putting one foot in front of the other even though the entire path hasn’t been revealed… knowing through feeling that you are on the right path even though you don’t know where it leads.

GETTING FEEDBACK
It is easy to get excited by an idea or feel ‘guided’ in some way to do crazy things. The individual may be disillusioned within their own brain to do what they feel is right. It is the disillusioned righteous (ruthless kings and dictators, various religious heads and cult leaders, etc.) that have created more harm than good.

Feedback can be measured in a variety of ways. For a human being that feedback is ‘happiness’. For a tree that feedback could be size, health and age. In general – the more ‘vibrant’ a life form is the closer that life form is to living at its full potential. In contributing to ‘life form vibrancy’ one grows in vibrancy; this is the genius of nature.

IN SUMMARY
What is the highest value thing you can focus on right now? It depends on the experiences you want to create for yourself and others. Your ability to clarify and answer these two questions is what makes you so incredibly powerful as a human being. Take the time to appreciate this gift and work this out through paper or on your blog.

Challenge Everything You ‘Know’

Posted in Perspective · Self Improvement · Spiritual Guidance |  Email This Post | by James Rick

Children by their very nature are curious.
What is curiosity? Curiosity is the desire to explore the unknown, to gather information and form a more complete picture of reality. Why do most adults lose their sense of curiosity? Because they feel they have gathered the necessary information to form a complete picture. This is the greatest ILLUSION ever created by the brain. It’s like taking a few snap shots of Earth and then using those snap shots to fill in the blanks. What if those snap shots were of Antarctica? Or the Desert? Can you imagine what kind of incorrect assumptions you would make about Earth. Now blow those erroneous assumptions up to a universal level. Not just physical territory mapping but relationships, emotions, thoughts and dreams, all the abstract stuff that is life, that is your reality. The snap shots you have experienced up until now are what you assume to be life - the complete picture. What a grand illusion.

Suspend what you know for a moment - consider that maybe, just maybe you haven’t explored all there is to know, that your model of reality is only a fragment of the complete picture. This returns you to the state of a child. You allow life to become a mystery again because you are strong enough to live with mystery. You don’t need to know everything. Not knowing is exciting. Challenging what you know makes you a child. It’s time to let your creative spirit explore again.

Top 10 Reminders to Live Your Full Potential

Posted in General |  Email This Post | by James Rick

It’s easy to read something the first time around and say ‘yes that makes sense, I’m going to do that’ and quite another to put it into practice.

In case you’ve already come across these tips - now it’s time to make them a reality.

TOP 10 REMINDERS ON HOW TO LIVE YOUR FULL POTENTIAL

1 - Get plenty of sleep (8 hours or so per day)
2 - Drink plenty of water- One 8 oz glass per every 1- 2 hours
3 - Eat green leafy vegetables - They are high in nutrients and are the best fuel for high energy.
4 - Exercise Daily- Get your heart pumping
5 - Read Daily- Develop an accurate model of reality so you can decide what you want and how to get it more effectively.
6 - Meditate Daily - Slow your mind down and learn to detach from the world at regular intervals. Learn the art of engaging and detaching.
7 - Get 15 min. of sunlight daily - Sunlight is one of the best ways for Vitamin D to get absorbed by your body. Notice how you feel after you get a little sun.
8 - Listen to uplifting music - Use uplifting music to positively influence the way you feel.
9 - Connect with people in positive ways - Energy comes from socializing. If you interact with people in caring, loving, compassionate, honest, affectionate and authentic ways you create more energy for yourself and the person you are interacting with than what existed before. 1 + 1 = 3
10 - Clean Focus + Short Breaks - In daily cycles the most productive way for a knowledge worker to work is two hours focused on one task (that’s clean focus) followed by a fifteen minute break. And in weekly cycles to totally withdraw from work and focus on a hobby or recreational activities that leave you feeling RE-Created.